TITLE: How To Join a Truck Club
Author: Jethro's Wife
Date Submitted: May 17, 2001
Thought ya'd all like ta know jist how hard it wuz for Jethro to pick a truck club for join'. First off, ya gotta choose a type o' truck to collect. For Jethro, he got himself lookin' thru one o' those web sites that advertise all kinds of stuff. Mostly he looks for cheap stuff 'cuz... well, ta be told truthful-like, he's kinda cheap.
Anyhow, he wuz browsin' thru the ads, an' he come 'cross a '66 Dodge pickup for $20. The guy's pa had jist passed on, an' the truck wuz out back in the weeds not doin' no body no good. So Jethro called me and sez, "Maisey Day, whatcha think a' Dodge pickups?"
Well, I ne'er did think much o' them t'al cuz, ta tell ya the truth, they'z kinda ugly. But jist like some folkes' kids, ya kinda gotta be polite-like.
"Well, they'z not real purty, but I guess someone's gotta want 'em. Chrysler did sell 'em, didn't they?" Jethro then proceeded to extol their many virtues - after all, he is a man of few words. After a quiet spell, he sez he reckons he'll mosey on by after work to jist take a looksee. Uh-huh.
Now y'all know what that means. Jist 'fore suppertime up comes a tow truck with a Dodge pickup ahangin' off the back. "Where ya want it, Ma'am?" asks the driver, real polite like. Sorta like he knew that this here could be a bit o' surprise for me. "I guess out back 'hind the shop," says I. "Have y'all seen my husband?"
"Oh, yes Ma'am. Jist a bit behind me with the other truck." Uh-huh. As it turns out there were two trucks , an' course Jethro couldn't 'cide 'tween the two. So, seein' his indecision, the guy gives him both for $35. There ain't nothin' like a good deal sez Jethro. (Sucker born every minute, thinks I as I pay the tow truck driver $30.)
Next mornin' there stood two gleamin' Dodges. Ne'er did see sunlight shine off moss liken' that 'fore. "Jethro," I asks, "Where'z the grill an' hood for that there 'un? An' why don't that there box on the other 'un sit square?" "Why, sweetie pie, it sits square 'nough! Tis the cab that's cockeyed. An' I'm sure I can find some sorta parts, round." Uh-huh.
So that's how 'we' started our Dodge collection.
That very next weekend Jethro's brother came 'round bright an' early 'bout a buddy's wife's cousin's friend out at Whidbey Island Naval Station that was givin' way a '69 Dodge pickup. On a'count he was movin' to the east coast. (The cousin's friend - not Jethro, tho' it wuz temptin'.) But it had ta be moved that day. So Jethro asks me what I think. 'Course I'd be thinkin' there's gotta be a hitch - nothin's 'free'. Well, Jethro was reassurin' that the only hitch wud be the one that the car trailer wuz on. So off they went, drivin' round the long way so as not ta have ta pay for no ferry ride, seein' how it wuz a free truck an' all. (Course gas don't cost nothin', thinks I.)
Well, sure as shootin', Jethro done called me long 'bout the time he shoulda been eatin' his noonday dinner. "Sweetie pie?" he sez. "What's the hitch?" asks I. "We-ell, the guy sez if I want his truck, I gotta take his parts truck too, as he's movin' an' all. Today like. An' he has ta have $50 for the parts truck." Uh-huh. Now don't y'all be forgettin' the $80 for gas for two rounds to the Island an' back.
Four Dodge pickups. Nothin' like a good deal. "I s'pose ya gotta join a Dodge Pickup Club now," sez I.
An' as that radio guy Paul Harvey sez, "Now y'all know ...the rest of the story."
know how right you are fella', and make sure you come to Camp Dodge!!